


This Bittersweet Smile

by vierana



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Bittersweet, M/M, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 18:53:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23845522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vierana/pseuds/vierana
Summary: It’s a different version of S05-E12, when Ian realized that running off with Monica wasn’t the best idea.I kinda always wished that Ian had taken the call from Mickey that night.
Relationships: Ian Gallagher & Mickey Milkovich, Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich
Kudos: 50





	This Bittersweet Smile

**Author's Note:**

> 6\. Prompt with random words: Bridge, prickly, hypnotize, tea

Under the night sky, from the distance and with lost eyes, Ian was staring at this trailer, suddenly realizing what he had done. Seeing Monica acting hyperactive like that, dragging him from place to place while he wasn’t barely able to gain enough force and will for a short walk, made him comprehend what this illness was about.

While he was just standing there and watching from the dark distance the lighted trailer, he could hear and see his mother chuckle with that weird dude about irrelevant stuff. It was like looking into the mirror. He hanging out at the club only a couple of weeks ago, feeling like on a never-ending trip of overwhelming life enjoying stomach tingling highs. And now he felt… This deep emptiness with a heavy, almost crushing sad undertone. Mickey and his family were right. He needed help.

His steps dragged him away from the trailer, along the path back to the main street, while he wasn’t really bothering about his surroundings. Instead he was staring at his phone, hesitating to push the call button. Ian barely noticed sinking down at the ledge of a pond, his eyes still focused on that screen.

  
“My place or yours?” The blond skinny guy with the belly button free shirt asked, while jumping into Mickey’s beige Buick.

“Yours.” he simply replied without even looking at his newest conquest.

As soon as the doors were shut, he started to drive, following the dudes instructions. Mickey had trouble to keep up, because this bitch was simply telling “left” or “right” shortly before he had to take the corner, because blondie was to busy talking about some random shit, without even barely taking time to breath. As Mickey would give a shit of his fag stories. What was his name again? Fuck, as he would care either. This would be a one or max two time thing anyway. The guy was somehow cute looking but besides that. Jesus, what is it with freaking gay guys, that they never shut their fucking mouth, babbling constantly about champagne and tea parties?

Driving on the freeway, his thoughts drifted but immediately brought him back to reality when his phone rang. Mickey fumbled it out his pocked while keeping his eyes on the street. The display showed a name he hadn’t expected to read soon, or maybe ever again?

_ Ian _ .

Unintentionally and all the sudden he felt a huge relieve in his chest area.  _ He was fine. Well at least he was alive _ . He didn’t hesitate a second to answer. 

“What the fuck Gallagher: Where the hell are you?!” These were the words which almost came out of his mouth. But when he heard Ian’s broken voice filled with sadness, and this this deep cry for help, he instantly shattered.

“Can you come and pick me up?”

Mickey almost whispered because his voice just gave in. “-Course.”

  
He hit the brakes immediately. Blondie just managed to support himself on the dashboard and so avoiding to smash his pretty face on the windshield.

“Get out.” Mickey said in a rough tone.

Bellybutton touched his heart, heavily breathing, still in shock from the sudden stop. “What?”

“I said, get the fuck out.”

He chuckled unbelievingly but concerned. “Wait, what happened? Who was that on the phone?”

“None of your damn business. Now get out or I have to kick your skinny ass.”

“Dude you can’t be serious? We are on the freeway and it’s the middle of the night.”

Mickey lifted his foot intending to really kick the guy.

“All right, all right. Jesus Christ.” The guy jumped out, barley being able to grab his pussy purse on the footwell, before Mickey hit the gas again so the door shut itself.

“Fuck you!” he heard him wining from the distance covered in exhaust gases and smoking wheels almost like in an action movie. But Mickey didn’t even bother to look into the rearview mirror. He just had one thought. To get Ian home safe.

  
On his two hour drive from Chicago to somewhere in the middle of fucking nowhere in Indiana, the time seemed to stand still. Seconds felt like minutes. His entire body was tense, his hands pressed around the staring wheel. Excitement made his heart rate increase. Even though it was around two o’clock in the morning he was fully awake. He didn’t even stop for a piss.

Relieve not settled in until he finally arrived at the bridge that Ian described and he saw a silhouette of a person sitting on the edge. He shut the engine but let the light on, so there was at least something brightening the small street, amidst this country area, surrounded by nothing but trees and corn fields.

Carefully Mickey climbed over a small railing and sat down next to him on the ledge without saying one word. Even though Ian must have heard the engine and his steps getting closer, the red head didn’t bother to turn for him or even to move a muscle. He just kept staring like hypnotized down to the river, which was floating silently and lazy only a couple of feet underneath of them and flickered magically in the reflection of the moonlight. As soon as he was seated and put it hands down to find some hold he felt a prickly pain in his butt and hands. The wood of the pond felt porous. Mickey wondered for how long Ian was already sitting there. Probably the whole fucking two hours. How could he not get bothered by this stitching? Mickey decided it’s best to be careful. Slowly he moved closer and pulled him into a hug making sure he couldn’t fall or jump.

God, it felt so good, having him back into his arms. The familiar smell of his hair and his well-trained arms made Mickey realize how much he really missed him. For a little while they were just sitting there, when he noticed Ian’s slight shivering. A soft breeze was blowing, which made the already chilly night even colder. He wondered how Ian was able to sit there for such a long time, not shaking as hell and almost freezing to death, with only such thin jacket on.

“Let’s go.” Mickey said softly and got first himself up, then helped Ian getting onto his feet carefully. Ian let Mickey lead him to the car. Still caught in his state of trance he took place on the passenger seat. Mickey grabbed his jacket from the back and put it around Ian’s shoulders before getting to the driver seat. He started the engine and turned on the heating.

For a while they were just driving. None of them saying even one word. Everytime Mickey glanced at the man next to him, he saw Ian just looking straight forward, barely even blinking.

“I missed you, you know?”

Ian didn’t react. Actually he wanted to say “you made me worrying sick, why didn’t you even answer my damn calls?” But he was aware that offending him wasn’t the right way to go now. He just got him back and didn’t intent to lose him again.

“I just want you to be ok. I fucking love you.” He cleared his throat. “You should know that too.” It was one of the rare times Mickey actually spoke those words out loud to him in person.

This was the moment when Ian turned his head to Mickey’s and threw him a sweet but also sad smirk before staring back out right into the dark of nowhere again.

Mickey knew, there was a lot for them to work out and get fixed, until they would become the carefree couple again, that they used to be. But this bittersweet smile gave him hope that not everything was completely lost. Somewhere in there he still cared about Mickey too. Right?

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it, though the missing happy ending...  
Side note: I am no native speaker. I'm doing this for fun and to improve my English skills. Please show mercy ;)


End file.
